1. |
they beat it out of me
03:26
|
|||
|
was once so green and naive, arteries spilled down my sleeve. when they were laughing at me, thought they were laughing with me. and from birth to the hearse, though we all go to the same place, for some it just keeps getting worse. broken blood vessels surrounding eyes. my smile may never touch them again. thus, my smile is just another lie. they beat it out of me, so now i just pretend. once danced without looking up, once danced without looking back. now i stand stock still, just waiting for a sneak attack. and they were looking at me, and they were staring at me. now wherever i go, i find an adversary. no, i'm not well but i'm certainly done. it was all decided before i'd begun. all the rest is just bland formality, feigning politeness by hiding all my misery. yeah, they beat it out of me.
|
||||
2. |
||||
|
it's got me seeing red again, at the after-party. i want to taste my own blood from the screaming. you begged for off-red medicine and lied about your plans for the evening. you have no connection to the darkness you crave. your body rejected it because you can't feel pain. with no capacity for torment, tears or rage. you can never withdraw when you were never engaged. and you were never engaged. i always knew you never were my friend. i hope your new age nightmare never ends. so sick of your trie-partied split. it was your kind, the strange and the ugly. in the second slot is to be despised. i pray for morpheus just to distance and drug me. just drug me. and i hope you choke on your own medicine. taken with a spoonful of your essense, sacharine. somehow, i lost the invite to my own afterparty. i ignored the insult, i was desperate for cammeraderie. your lies ran out, your time ran out.
|
||||
3. |
i'm bored (iggy pop)
03:06
|
|||
|
lyrics and music by iggy pop: i'm bored. i'm the chairman of the bored. i'm a lengthy monologue, i'm living like a dog. i'm bored. i bore myself to sleep at night, i bore myself in broad daylight, because i'm bored. i'm just another slimey bore. i'm free to bore my well-payed friends, and spend my cash until the end, because i'm bored. i'm the chairman of the bored. i'm sick. i am sick of all my kicks. i'm sick of all the stiffs and i'm sick of all the dips, i'm bored.
|
||||
4. |
sleeping sickness
05:14
|
|||
|
if it doesn't wound me, what i consume will consume me. find a soft place, my arms cover my face. then dragged from dreams i'm kicking and screaming and sweating. a half-dead live-wire, my bones ache, i've got a dark desire. there's no relief in the house, there's no relief in this town. the main drag is up all night while i drag myself around. i am out and i am down, i am out but no i cannot go downtown. i can't sleep. i know too well what they presume and assume about me. this respite won't last, for sleep's tense is now past. i can't stay under, i'm forced towards a churning surface. but it's not yet day, to fill my needs and desires there is no way. there's no relief allowed until dawn and no release from this ride i'm on. they take for granted what i can't wrap my head around. i am out and i am down, i am down and i am out. i'm in solitary and my body is a jail. and there's no bail. i can't sleep.
|
||||
5. |
chainsmoker
03:12
|
|||
|
falling along with the sun and there is nothing to break it. meant well making those plans, now i know i won't make it. it takes an effort to breathe and i can feel my heart racing. still, i chainsmoke on the lawn, just pacing and pacing. i'm a nervous ten car pile-up. easy to break, fake-out, fuck-up. lost at home beneath the moonglare. i chainsmoke and search but it's just not there. distance will not make your body remain sounder or safer. you try to be recognized, they misinterpret each layer. and illness will turn your body into a civi war, while aging makes you wonder what the fuck you're fighting for. get me out of this fucking gridlock. can't fuck who or how i want or just fucking stop. stuck at home, there's no reward for persistance. why does salvation for me have to be a new exsistance?
|
||||
6. |
house of lies
03:12
|
|||
|
i've been to the house of lies, though i never was a guest. all the tenants move like flies. twitchy limbs and eyes, and the place is a squalid mess. the boys have shotgun shells and rape in their eyes. girls sit on the couch with stapled mouths. the only kind of questions they don't despise can be answered with a no or a yes. you probably know the rest. i was mistaken as a spy. though i never passed that test. i find it so damn hard to rise. i can't stifle the cries, and they say i'm a fucking mess. and i know that i'm no longer welcome here. i have never been welcomed anywhere. when you're kicked long enough you start to detest. then you sink down on the floor. you're endlessly repressed in the house of lies.
|
||||
7. |
hell is other people
03:13
|
|||
|
i try so fucking hard. i've forgotten what i'm trying to get out of it. i sacrifice my body and my brain in search of a purpose. the hits keep coming, but they are the kind that leave black eyes and bloody lips. some rocks are not meant to be moved. it was always a rut, it was never a groove. some rocks you can see through. at least it makes me feel a bit better to insult them to their face. oh hell is other people, and life is like high school. they lock you in a locker while the trophies are awarded to the cruel. you hate the roll they cast you in the junior musical. and you do not get the option to not participate at all. most rocks are tossed right at your face. others are thrown into your path to put you in your place. some are hard and some are smooth and you don't notice them at all...until you hear soprano laughter when you fall. i try so fucking hard.
|
||||
8. |
||||
|
you're crossing county lines and all the dope is free, well you're living out my abandoned dreams. i'm on the patio with yellowed diaries while you're living out my abandoned dreams. i'm not cruel, but i've got nothing nice to say about you. well you were right on time while i was three scats behind, now you're living in my abandoned mine. you're in the neighborhood and you're a world apart. why move when just freezes, and everyone is trying to take advantage of me. see i was barely breathing when they cast my part. a weak tea bag in a lukewarm sea, while time seeps more and more atrocities. you're young, you're mean, adored inexplicably, met with sycophantic screams. so many worthless ones of you, and only one unwanted me. well i'm no fool, but i might sell my soul to be you. because there's nothing but this life, fantasies aside and until i'm gone it's just a waste of time.
|
||||
9. |
blacklisted life
04:46
|
|||
|
this is the beginning of the end of starting over, and i'm as baffled and lost as i've ever been. this total twinning is viewed with mass suspicion, and the conditions of my birth ensured i'd never win. i've found no tribe and home is not a place. and i haven't figured out the bribe that would soften every scornful face. the things i brood about at night have never changed. and those who sleep so soundly are ignorant or just derainged. now it has been years since petty cruelty surprised me. these days i'm shocked by mere consideration. but countless tears reveal that expectation does not lessen hurt and time does nothing but multiply the desperation. i make the blacklist where i show my face. and you can never go home again when home has never been anyplace. and i'll always be off-kilter and sad and strange. and freedom from the predators can't be sought or wished or arranged.
|
||||
10. |
sick sicker sickly
04:13
|
|||
|
a small hand gripped a throbbing ear. my small face tear and dirt smeared. i was no stranger to infection, pain and fear. then the nausea came calling and never left. each throw up like a tiny death. when the stomach pains struck they had me praying to empty it. and i'll never understand why people shun vulnerability. so i search for people who are just like me: sick, sicker sickly. now i feel sick therefore i am. a sickly boy, all half-destroyed. a stranger to the ways of everyone, still staring directly into the sun. oh the terror, oh the dread, oh the spectre of the hospital bed. yet they will never understand why we take medicating into our own hands.
|
||||
waiting around to die Santa Barbara, California
waiting around to die formed in march of 2010, in santa barbara, CA. they are a duo, and have completed two albums and are working on their third. wa2d love to play live and people say their sets are entertaining. they will play any party, bar, club or other venue in any city. for booking or other concerns write ryan klauk at facebook or write the band at waitingaroundtodiesb@gmail.com. thanks. ... more
If you like waiting around to die, you may also like:
Mot, the Valuator, Incredible God
by Ox en Mayo Alto
A heavy blend of post-rock and shoegaze from Argentina's Ox en Mayo Alto rides big emotional crests and contemplative valleys.
go to album
Sometimes I Forget You're Human Too
by Bored at My Grandmas House
Melodic alt-pop in the vein of Soccer Mommy is driven by winding guitar lines and augmented with dreamy shoegaze elements.
go to album
An easy-to-love combination of emo and jangle pop, the first full album from Spirit Night in eight years feels bathed in a golden glow.
go to album
Pebble / Gre[a]y SPLIT LP
by GLOM
The Brooklyn indie band turns dystopian thoughts into feel-good music on their latest EP.
go to album
Under The Surface
by Nameless Ghost
The wrenching songs on the latest from Nameless Ghost tackle loss and grief amidst toothy indie rock.
go to album
Indie rock band Same, from Pittsburgh, have shades of Pavement and Slint in their chaotic guitars crossed with strong melody lines.
go to album
Searching, anthemic post-rock centered around turbulent crescendos and mournful vocal melodies, with tasteful, proggy touches.
go to album
